la vie est belle.

i watched pan's labyrinth today. i tried not to cry, half because i was embarrassed to cry in front of sean. otherwise, i would have. it's tragic, but it's amazing. one of the best movies i've seen in my entire life. it is a beautiful film, though its message is deeply morose.

if i could link it to anything it would be life of pi, because at the end it is up to you to decide what you believe. the main disparity between the two, though, would be with life of pi your faith leans you toward the animal story...and with pan's, your humanity leads you towards its equivalent of the murder-cook story... i want to believe the magic so much...it almost hurts.

"CARMEN: As you get older, you'll see that life isn't like your fairy tales. The world is a cruel place. And you'll learn that, even if it hurts.

She throws the mandrake into the fire.

OFELIA: No!

CARMEN: Ofelia!! Magic does not exist!

She grabs the girl by the shoulders, shaking her.

CARMEN: Not for you, me or anyone else!"

i opened my lovely copy of Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close, read parts, as inspired by miss harley, and discovered the map of the universe. what's particularly special about my copy when it comes to this map is the writing in pencil that takes me by surprise every time i run into it... a couple of stars are named, the galaxy becomes my galaxy, my love, my life. anna, eric, leslie, anna, jamie, me; we're all named. i suppose i should take the liberty of adding more stars...

when i found myself at this page i cried. because that page is beautiful.

gogo loves didi; didi is beautiful.